3. SORRY, BUT YOU MAY HAVE NOT REALLY BEEN CHEATED ON
This is gonna be easy. Simple, short and to the point. You see, I almost left this part out, cuz this is for those who KNOW they're getting cheated on. But there are still ppl out there thinking they're being cheated on and really aren't. There are ppl who are holding on to what they KNOW no longer exists. It's 2009, ppl no longer have to say "It's over" for it to be. People give signs clearer than a stop light and their mates/former mates just refuse to accept it. Not only do they refuse rejection, they wait until their mate finds a new person to call it cheating. Like I said in Lesson 1, KNOW YOU'RE BEING CHEATED ON before taking the steps to healing. Cuz you may be hurting for no reason at all.
Do ya'll even talk anymore? When you call does he/she even answer anymore? When ya'll are together do you find yourself TRYING to be attractive to your sig other? When you are together does it seem like you're even there? If you answered yes to these, well you may have already been dumped and just not know it. Now what your mate is doing isn't right, I feel a person should verbally communicated when he/she is tired of being w/a person. BUT, I also believe aint no point staying w/a person you KNOW FOR SURE DON'T WANT YO ASS ANYMORE. You may not know he/she is cheating or not, but you starting to realize it was over before you even started your suspicions. IF the person you're with is not expressing the same love you are expressing, or the same love they promised to express in the beginning, check URSELF. This person may be seeing other ppl, you found out bout a trick he was buying drinks for in the club, she won't answer your texts but when she's w/u every call/text gets answered, you know the deal. But if your sig other mentally has given up on you, and seems to not even try to keep it secret, you've been dumped. Sorry, no reason to accuse of cheating here, just pack up and bounce. Unless you're a chaser. Some ppl get a rise outta chasing ppl who don't want/no longer wants them. IF your mate doesn't even wanna talk to you anymore, why you even worried bout who he/she fuckin round with? Sholl aint you! So move it along!!
You'll end up lookin like a fool in the end. Know your status in the relationship, throughout the WHOLE relationship, and you won't get caught looking stupid either.
4. THE FAT LADY IS READY TO SING...
So are you ready for it to be over? Or have you decided Biggie deserves one more chance lol. Either way, you've made it to step 4, and I'm proud of you. Whatever your decision is is the best one cuz it's YOURS.
If you've decided it's over, learn from your lesson. Open your heart to the world, the only direction is up from here. You are a beautiful person, please don't validate yourself by how ONE person feels about you. Avoid conflict avoid conflict avoid conflict. I don't care if you live next door to the mofo, if you are moving on, tip your hat to the past and look forward. Stop trying to see who he/she dating now, asking ppl what dirt he/she has gotten into, basically STOP DRAGGING THIS ON. It's like driving a car with a flat tire. Oh you'll still be able to drive on that flat, but no one else will wanna ride w/u, behind you, or around you. You'll be this walking hazard light cuz you just can't seem to get that tire replaced, and your life will not progress, at least not positively. STOP THE CAR. Get out, change the tire, hell get a car wash, and if you aint got time for that, park that muhfucka and head to the bus. It's time to start your life. Cuz it never ended. Especially not cuz of this one person. AIGHT?
IF you've given it one more chance, do just that. Give your mate the benefit of the doubt, we all make mistakes and everyone deserves a FULL chance to make it up. So let him/her do that. Hell if you need to restart the relationship, help yourself heal by learning the REAL person you're dealing with. Love this mofo even more than you did before, cuz if you become paranoid she/he will do it again you will not be able to enjoy the full potential of what this connection could bring. YES I've seen ppl cheat and work it out, earn that trust back and some are still w/the person, happily, to this day. You chose this person for a reason, and now you've forgiven this person for a reason. That reason is LOVE, and if you aint got enough of it left for that person, don't pretend. Don't make this person beg and plead for your true forgiveness if you will constantly throw it back in his/her face. It's a lame excuse to release your insecurities and a terrible way to show the person you're even worth proving shit to anyway. Be the good person ALL THE TIME. Work on THE issues, not YOUR everlasting issues from the cheating.
I hope my guide has helped you all. Like I said I don't promote cheating or think it's cool. I've faced some all time lows going through cheating and being cheated on, and anyone who is reading this is someone I got mad love for anyway. I don't wanna see anymore ppl go under cuz of this subject. Cheating happens, but it doesn't have to ruin your life. See the last 2 words of that sentence? YOUR LIFE. Live it, Love it, LOVE EACH OTHER. I appreciate you all reading my work, and I wish all of you the best of luck in love, and everything else you do.
I love you, and if he/she doesn't, somebody else will.
Peace.
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