My MOM's 5 Reasons Why You Should NOT Have Anal Sex

Close your mouth, it's hanging open a lil.
Lol I know I know, WTF right? Look my mom and I discuss everything openly and candidly. So NO, my family does not sit around and talk about butt sex all day. Some of us definitely joke about it though lol.
Anyway, my mom and I were discussing a lil bit of everything, from Tiger Woods hoe issues to the new season of America's Next Top Model to (all of a sudden) why would a woman enjoy anal sex? She said she understands gay men cuz duh, there's no where else to put it. But
Lol she said she was watching some show on MTV or whatever and some girls were joking about how guys like anal. She's a true joker so she had me DYING laughing when she made me promise to never have anal sex. Moms always make you promise not to do some shit (no pun intended) you weren't gonna do anyway.
So from our discussion I was able to draw 5 reasons NOT to have anal sex.


1.It can rip your asshole!
2.It can fuck w/ur digestive activity and cause stomach problems
3.Doesn't that shit hurt?
4.(and I MUST quote) "He might be pushing something back up there that's trying to get out!"
5.That's just not what the asshole is made for. And doesn't that shit hurt?


Lol like I said these are HER reasons. She's not a medical professional or anything so if you like to get down like that more power to ya. And more lube to ya too!


To be honest, I wanted this article to be symbolic in a couple ways. I wanted to talk about the best asshole I ever met, my mother. Lol take it how you want, but she's a true asshole, hell both my parents are.
But she's a different type. She's a reliable, honest, open minded, educated, and experienced asshole. She raised one, so I know one when I see one. She always speaks her mind with very little regard for emotions. She handles business and never lets business handle her. She made sure that no one in the world knows everything she knows except her only child, ME. That, my faithful wurms, is my definition of the perfect asshole. AND if anyone knows my mother they know I say that with love and all my heart.
I also wanted to emphasize that in this day and age it's important to be on some decent communication level w/ur parents. Things are different these days, we all know that. The fabric of the strong family is often unraveled. Nevertheless, as adults we need to not only stay connected to our parents but be an example to our youth so they too can feel comfortable about opening up. It's too much going on to have closed mouths.
And sure, we don't get to choose our parents, so do what you can. Sometimes the only connection some have to their parents is memories. Let's change the cycle.


Hope you enjoyed reading, if not, then you too are a true asshole.
Peace

Suge Knight...STILL keepin it "gangsta"

A HA HA HA HA HA HA
Ya'll ain't see this one coming? Omg I swear Suge Knight gon be 65 years old STILL jumping rappers w/10 niggas and whatnot. Here's the details I scooped from TMZ


Cops: Suge Knight Wanted for Beating, Robbery

Posted Mar 23rd 2010 4:00PM by TMZ Staff

Suge Knight a Suspect in Robbery CaseSuge Knight is a wanted man once again. The former Death Row Records head honcho allegedly beat and robbed rapper Yukmouth last night ... law enforcement sources tell TMZ.

Sources say it all went down at around 10 PM at a Ralph's supermarket in the San Fernando Valley.

According to a law enforcement source, Suge and roughly 10 members of his posse allegedly beat up Yukmouth and then took $92,000 worth of jewelry from him.

Sources say Suge and his entourage are suspects and cops want to question them.

We're also told there's a previous misdemeanor warrant out for Suge's arrest -- which makes it unlikely he'll visit the police department.

Read more: http://www.tmz.com/2010/03/23/suge-knight-death-row-police-investigation-yukmouth-beating-robbery-grocery-store/#ixzz0jCKpaV3x

Cops: Suge Knight Wanted for Beating, Robbery

Just wanted 2 say thanx....

Hey Wurms!!
You know I mean that in the BEST way possible. All of my blog subscribers, YouTube channel watchers, cheesecake eaters, "Daily Wurd" text recipients, hat & scarf buyers, and ALL OVER FAMILY, you truly are appreciated. I sometimes feel I put alot more on my plate than I can handle, and maybe I do lol. Nevertheless I try my best do deliver nuttin but love and honest opinion. If you don't ALREADY know how to reach me, I'm on Facebook, Twitter, Myspace (I'm not that active tho), this blog of course, and my email is Diori86@gmail.com
I hope all of you are remaining in the highest spirits and levels of love, peace, understanding, and all those other good nouns. Ur support keeps me going...like a quick nap...or a Twix bar lol.
Stay tuned to all my avenues for more videos, articles, opinions, crafts, cheesecakes, and whatever else I can cook up. Take care Wurms,
DUB

RECESS!! It's Time To Play...

CHICAGO POETS,SINGERS,RAPPERS,WHATEVER!
Come express yourself and your art at RECESS! An Open Mic hosted by yours truly. Yes I'm excited to be hosting my first gig. Not to mention @ Backstory Cafe and Social Center, a cozy spot with delicious, HEALTHY menu items and tons of monthly events. Let's support local businesses...did I mention free WiFi? Yeeeeah.

Thursdays (including this 1 coming up) @ Backstory Cafe, 6100 S. Blackstone
(Take Stony to 60th street, go west to Blackstone)
Time: Doors open @ 7:30pm, Show starts @8pm
Cost: $3 but THIS Thursday 2 people get in for $5. FO DA LOW!
For more info on Backstory Cafe hit up www.backstory.com or call 773.324.9987


Even adults need a little playtime...

Are You Flickin Serious?

Hopefully none of my godchildren will request this one, cuz I refuse to buy it and would hate seeing them enjoy it. Check out the Flickin Chicken game. Yeah, flickin...chicken.
Don't think too hard now, or you'll lose the point of the game.
It comes with a frisbee shaped dart board and 4, count em 4, rubber chickens. Not special rubber chickens, I'm talking the corny joke,Fonzy the Bear rubber chickens.
That's it.
Throw the frisbee dart thingy and wherever it lands is where the game will be. Cuz then you toss a chicken. At the dart thingy. On the floor.
After NINE ROUNDS of that bullshit the player who gets the LOWEST score wins the game.
I've found 3 good reasons why I'm offended. Ya'll just choose one.
1. It's a recession. The last thing we need to teach children is how to waste good chicken.
2. I dunno how kids feel bout this,but in a world where 6 year olds have cell phones & can practically install their own cable, tossing chickens at a frisbee is stupid. I don't care how imaginative children are SUPPOSED to be, this would suck. Man this sucks worst than the 18th round of tic tac toe, or marbles. God I hated marbles.
3. Look, I'm Black okay? Random chicken throwing hurts my stereotyped heart.

Not to mention the retail price is bout $25. Man that's enough for a fifth of drank, a chicken dinner and bus fare. Of course that's not a child's definition of a good time, but someday, it might be...
Back on topic. Ppl, ever since the Pet Rock manufacturers have been able to get hard earned money out of parents everywhere for some of the dumbest toys ever. So dumb they're almost offensive lol. So ppl be aware of what you buy, especially for your kids. I mean, you buy them stupid shit,they start to appreciate stupid shit. Cuz this game ain't creative, it's chicken shit! Get it? Okay I'm done.

Ridiculous

DJ Tapedek...legend and friend. Rest In Peace

Christian Hales, aka DJ Tapedek made his transition last week. He was a good friend of mine and musical genius. His music blended jazz, hip hop, and international influences. (All my followers, you may remember his music being featured under "Chicago Hawt Shyt" on the blog) If you haven't heard/seen his work you've missed out.
Check out afterscoolsociety.bandcamp.com to download his discography from Afters Cool Society for free.
Chris, I miss the hell outta you. My tater tot pimp, I'll see you when I too reach that better place.

Earthquake hits Turkey

Over 50 people killed in a 6.0 magnitude earthquake that hit eastern Turkey early this morning.About 80 aftershocks measured between 5.5 and 5.8, all happening around 4:30 am.
Though Turkey has a history of earthquakes, including one in 1999 measuring 8.0 and killing almost 20,000 people, I can't help but feel a little fear as to what this earth REALLY has in store for us. I never use religion as a base for future world destruction; I see human beings destroying earth with my own eyes. So, with a heavy heart I'd like to show you what's happening overseas. I'm sure this won't get as much press as the other earthquakes. All these natural disasters aren't what's "in" anymore.

How I REALLY Feel About Black Men Dating White Women...

(Re-posted from Facebook)
Ok. Whew.
I dunno. I just don't know. But I do feel like this.
Black women: Don't complain bout brothas having relationships with white women cuz most of ya'll find no shame in a Black woman dating a white guy. I hear ya'll in the salons. Alot of ya'll also refer to "these niggas" as not "being shit" alot too.
Black men: Don't be talking about you've tried and just can't seem to find a Black woman who supports you. You happen to find a white girl you're into, that's cool. But your reasons reflect you as a person. If your true preference is a Black woman then you man up and spend time finding the right Black woman. Now if your true preference is open, then be about that. But trust it's good Black women out there, so if you're going to date outside your race, don't use that as a reason.
I don't care. I feel Black people have a long way to go before demanding who the next one can date. We need to work on ourselves so we can shine our natural light and attract each other. True love has no color, that's just how it is. But what we can change is how we love ourselves thus changing how others view loving us. Black people, that is.
Peace